Behind starburst eyes

May 7

Some things you just can’t Google

by starbursteyes

There are times when I get caught up in ensuring that Mr.C is “on-track” or “at grade level” with his peers. I get fixated from time to time on the lists lit up upon my computer screen of all the things our local school board says he should know at this time. Lists of facts and figures, books they have chosen, grammatical rules and scientific theories. But no where in their reams of pages does it speak of morals, attitude, creative thinking, leadership skills, ingenuity or honour.

When I get caught up on what he does or does not know academically, I remind myself of the following:

I am not here to create a robot that can spout facts or scientific theories verbatim, but lacks the ingenuity to put them to productive use when he needs or even wants to do so.

I am not here to force him to memorize plots and dialogues, but lacks the critical thinking skills to grasp the significance of some of the literary works of art we currently have access to as a society in general.

I am not here to ensure he conforms to someone else’s standards, but lacks the honour and strength of character to stand up for what is right when what is wrong is being accepted as the status quo.

What I AM here to do is to teach him to (eventually) be a good man. To be the type of person others will be proud to call their friend, their ally. To be someone with enough courage to stand up for what is right, even when he’s forced to stand alone to do so. To be a man of honour, of integrity, to be a man of  ingenious leadership abilities, even when he’s only leading himself along his own path.

Don’t get me wrong, I DO teach him academics, but if it takes him a bit longer than some piece of paper says to learn about the periodic table of elements or the correct placements of commas I’m okay with that. Why, because he’s learning SO much more right now, he’s learning how to become the man he will be for the rest of his life.

Plus if he forgets the standard conversion rate of ATP to ADP he can Google it, but when it comes to things like strength of character well there are some things you just can’t Google 😉

Autism; second verse same as the first Mommyhood: Fake it till you make it

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May 6

Murphy’s Law in play!

by starbursteyes

 

Last night Mr.N slept 2 hours and was then up for the rest of the night, so we all started out seriously sleep deprived.

I’d planned on tidying up the house the morning as Mr.C had friends coming over and I wanted it to look nice, I know they don’t really care, it’s me that cares about other people being in my home when it’s messy. I say it doesn’t matter to me, but secretly I run around trying to clean as much as I can if I know that people will be visiting. However, just as I was about to start, my niece was sick at school and her mom was an hour away at placement for school so we picked her up and brought her to our place until her mom was able to come and get her. Of course even though her school is in the same building as Grandview I left Mr.C’s paperwork that is due for his ABA assessment at home instead of remembering to grab it and drop it off while I was already there.

Then it was off to homeschool group at the Y, and it was the one I was running. I get there and Mr.C’s 2 friends are there and there’s a kerfuffle about them being signed in, eventually it got fixed up thankfully!

We all come back home the 5 kids (my 3 and Mr.C’s 2 friends) all played and had a good time until their parents came and grabbed them. (Which was the only part that didn’t go wrong lol)

Because it’s Monday night Mr.C also had his 4H Bike Club tonight, so off the hubby goes to bring him when the power steering goes while he’s driving. He forces the van to the side of the road and the belt had shredded.

I called his leader and she was just lovely, she felt bad that she couldn’t come and get him herself but it was too close to 6:30 for her to leave and come back. She was truly sad he was missing it, and kindly suggested that Safety Village has open house days and perhaps I could take him another time so he didn’t miss out on it. (I totally am!)

We call my brother only to find out that his stove’s element exploded not 10 minutes before we called, and he now has a pot with no bottom left to it! An hour into the broken van part of our evening he realizes he doesn’t have his wallet, it’s in fact gotten lost during his trip to help get the van running again.

30 minutes later, a couple and their teen stop by WITH his wallet! They found it in the middle of the road with all the cards and papers and pictures scattered across the street. They’d stopped and he’d quickly darted onto the road to try and get it all picked up and returned. The money was already gone by the time he found it, but he managed to find all of his I.D and one of the pictures of the girls. We tried to offer him some money but he refused and so I darted into the house and got a jar of the sweet cherry jam we’d made as well as the very last candle I’d made with the blessed oils I’d been gifted with. It was the least I could give him for his kindness.

He said he thought he’d gotten everything, but that he wasn’t sure. Sadly there was something missing, something far more important than the money, my brother had a picture of Joy in his wallet, a very precious one, it was the very first photo that was ever taken of her when she was first in the NICU after she was born.

THANKFULLY they had told us where exactly they found it and he went back to see if he could find anything, and he did. On the street were some business cards, and most importantly her photo!

Finally after all of this, the tow truck showed up, they got a ride, they got the van fixed and are now home. And now this momma just wants to have a glass of wine and veg out 🙂

Mommyhood: Fake it till you make it Secret Garden

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May 1

True Inclusion Means Real Accessibility

by starbursteyes

This past week-end my niece had a sleepover at my house and the next morning we wanted to take her and our kids to the park. Awhile ago we had gone to a park in our town and it had a wheelchair accessible swing, so of course we took the kids to that park. Below is the picture I took after we got there:

 

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The swing modified for wheelchairs was gone. While Miss.F had no idea about the swing, my husband and I had and we were truly disappointed, as we’d chosen that park so that there were parts of the park that all of the kids with us could use. I’m fully about modifying things so that all can participate, after all who didn’t like to swing on a swing set as a kid? To that end I have contacted our Parks and Recreation department.

The woman I spoke with was very helpful, and I truly appreciated it. She forwarded my questions to their manager and said he would contact me within 2 business days. About 2 hours later he called to explain that it was ready and waiting to be installed but they were waiting on the manpower needed to do so and that the wait could be 2-3 weeks.

Almost a month on top of the time it’s already been down, the only wheelchair accessible swing in our town. I don’t like it, I understand that all work on the 30+ parks and trails needs to be prioritized but it’s the only swing many children in our town can use safely.

I have emailed our Mayor John Henry to hopefully see about implementing a change in the process with which projects are prioritized in the parks department. After seeing how he interacted with all of the kids and families at Grandview’s Open House last night, and what a big supporter he is of inclusion and services for special needs children I have full confidence that he will do whatever he can to help alter they way they prioritize what needs to be done at each park here in our town.

 

Mommyhood: Fake it till you make it

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