Behind starburst eyes

The day after the night before

on November 2, 2013

Well dear readers as you all know I was supposed to take 5 children trick-or-treating last night. We got a phone call from C’s friend B asking if he wanted to trick-or-treat with him this year. Somehow it became 6 children that were trick-or-treating with myself and the hubby last night. I want to say that it was a blast, with lots of exclamation marks and smiley faces. I want to say it went perfectly and that each child was able to handle the sensory onslaught with perfect ease. But I also want to wake up with no wrinkles or cellulite and that’s not happening either 😉

There were moments that were amazing, sparkling in their crystal-clear sharpness of perfection, and there were moments of momma heart-break where I wondered if only for a moment rather bitterly why his brain was robbing him of these fleeting moments for Halloween is only once a year. But then I would breathe in, hold him close and whisper to him, trying with all my might to block out the world around him for just a moment for his sake so he could regain his center, so he could find joy once more in this night. 
While for a moment I was angry and bitter that his own amazing brain wasn’t allowing him to filter enough to enjoy the night, I watched as my NT step-daughters struggled as well at times. The eldest was having issues with her choice in footwear (boots instead of sneakers) and the rain. While the youngest was having issues with getting in trouble for shoving children out of the way so she could obtain more candy. (She’ll be 9 in 3 months, I get being excited, but I’m not accepting actual pushing or shoving in a quest for more candy) C’s friend was cold and wet, and “his feet were falling off”. Listening to all of them I thought to myself, perhaps it’s just that C is more open with me about his struggles, perhaps many children find Halloween and Trick-or-treating slightly overwhelming, at least when it’s raining and windy out.

The youngest boy loved the entire night. He sang “Trick-or-treat, Halloween” over and over as we walked from house to house. I smiled at him and asked him if he was happy, and his answer was one of “those” moments. He said “Yes” and when  I asked him why thinking his answer would be candy I nearly cried when he responded “You fix everything” I thought I’ll do my best little man, I’ll do my best. 
So next year I will try again to ensure that the 3 children I will have with me (potentially more if C has friends come along) have a blast. 
Oh and I did “fix” if for C, well at least I gave him something to focus on enough that he blocked out whatever else was too much for him. How you ask, I chased the elder children C included with G in her stroller complete with zombiefied rocking horse attached to the front, cackling loudly with wild abandon until I saw my C smile again. 

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