Behind starburst eyes

Wrong Number

Normally when I receive a rude phone call I simply shrug and hang up. Today I did not, today I got upset. I received a call from a Vijai Karthigesu at Cloud Dynamics who at first was polite. He was polite until while being equally polite I told him he had the wrong number. Then he became rude. Insisted he had the correct number and demanded that I put the homeowner on the phone. Now my father passed away 21years ago this October, so I’m pretty sure that when someone asks for him they have no idea who they are actually calling. MY husband is NOT referred to by my maiden name, and just because the phone is still in it is regardless.

The only Mr.____ was my father and therefore I typically just tell them they have the wrong number. I don’t go into details about my father being dead, I assume that they are some sort of telemarketer and that they have specific quotas in regards to time spent on the phone verses sales etc. so I try to keep it short and let them get on to the next call they need to make.

Besides quite honestly, I’m not buying, I don’t care what they are trying to sell me, I’m not going to say yes. I don’t say yes to charities over the phone either. (I do however regularly donate to specific charities of my own personal choosing but that’s another matter)

Now back to Mr.Vijai Karthigesu at Cloud Dynamics, after he was rude and demanding I got upset and loudly proclaimed that I was the homeowner and that he had the wrong number. He then hung up on me, and even that is atypical for me, but I went even further today; I called him back, why you ask. He’d hung up, honestly I should have just left it alone and let it go. But today I’m just sick of being told I’m wrong lately and that I have to do what others tell me to do, that I have not even the basic right to a say in my own actions.

After calling back and getting no answer I at least got the name of the company he worked for as well as his proper name. I then googled him and the company. It’s an IT solutions company. Are you kidding me, if someone could please explain to me how exactly my dead father is in need of an IT solutions company’s solicitations I’d appreciate it, because I definitely don’t know how they expect to help him. Or how he’d pay them, or even how he’d communicate with them for that matter about his IT needs. And the more I think about it, the funnier it all is, THANKFULLY, cause for a little bit I was starting to lose perspective. I was starting to feel like this faceless random person meant anything. But he doesn’t, not really. As for the rest of why I’ve been feeling the way I have lately, well that lovely readers is a whole ‘nother post.

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Wandering Fever

That dreaded feeling hit me again today. One moment I’m trying my best to produce moves that somewhat resemble the Arriba instructor’s and the next “BAM” that overwhelming, all-encompassing ache hits and radiates from my solar plexus.

Since I was a child my family has always called it Wandering Fever. My grandmother used to get it, she’d take off for weeks or months at a time when it would strike. My mother still gets it, she’s always been so understanding when I get it, because of course she really does get how I feel. She’s never just taken off when it happens, mind you she’s taken us kids when we were younger on random road trips.

It strikes at different times, and unlike “Spring Fever” doesn’t appear just in the spring. I can get it anytime, any season.

It’s an ache that’s accompanied by overwhelming sadness at a loss I don’t grasp the root of. I feel like I’m missing something. It’s almost as if my spirit has heard a call and I don’t know how to answer it. I’ve traveled more miles than I care to admit trying to assuage the ache. I’ve hopped on buses, and trains, walked aimlessly until I was too tired to walk anymore, I’ve convinced close friends to go on road trips with me and random travels, but to no avail.

I never end up wherever it is that I feel called to be, and eventually the feeling goes away. But it sucks while it lasts. It used to be exciting when I was younger, mostly because I thought I’d eventually find what the heck I was looking for. Now, now I just try my best to breathe through it, and remember that it’ll eventually pass.

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Liebster Award

So I was nominated for a Liebster Award (thank-you Tailorfairy!) In order to follow the rules of the nomination I have to tell you lovely readers 11 facts about myself, answer the 11 questions that TailorFairy made for me. So here I go:

1) I don’t know how to swim, well I can do the doggy paddle but that’s it.

2) I am not a morning person, I always try to wake-up 30minutes before my kids to collect myself.

3) I wish I knew how to dance

4) I don’t have a middle name

5) My favorite hair color on myself is Fushia.

6) I started to dye my hair Fushia to help my eldest son when he was 3years old to pick me out of a crowd quickly due to his issues with facial recognition.

7) I was 22years old when my eldest son was born.

8) When I was in high school I took fashion design, wood shop, and photography courses and loved all 3 equally.

9) I’m naturally left handed

10) My engagement ring has a ruby as it’s center stone with 2 rose quartz flanking it instead of a traditional diamond engagement ring. (My wedding band however is a thin circle of diamonds)

11) I only have 1 sibling, an older brother.

11 questions from TailorFairy:

1) If you could do anything, what would be your job?
Gosh, that’s actually a really difficult question, I’d have to say a developmental therapist working with special needs children.

2) If you could move anywhere, where would you go?

If I were to be able to move anywhere it’d be a tough choice between Ireland and Spain.

3) Favorite Food?

Thai pineapple and beef rice.

4)favorite color?

Really depends on my mood, each color resonates with me more at different times based on different moods of mine.

5)favorite movie?

I don’t really have one, I hardly ever watch a movie more than once.

6) favorite tv-show?

Bones

7) favorite pattern/print on clothes?

Gotta be Gingham, I LOVE it 😀

8) favorite candy?

Fruit Roll-Ups

9) favorite material to work with?

Cotton, I know you’d think something more exotic with the plethora of choices out there but to work with I love the simplicity of working with cotton. Mind you if we’re talking about favorite material for the completed look only and we ignore my mutterings while working with it than satin or lace.

10) favorite toy as a child?

My barbie doll.

11) what did you want to do for a while now, but never dared to do?

Give away most of our belongings, and back-pack around the world with the kids.

 

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N’s Book of Colors

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My youngest son is mad for any and all types of vehicles, so I made him his own book of colors with each color being showin with a different type of vehicle. I LOVE fabric books (often called soft books or felt books, as felt is often what they’re made out of) Mine however was not made with felt as you can see, I used satin for the coveres, and denim for all of the pages.  I also used quilt batting within each page to make it keep it’s shape and be fluffy for him. He loves to flip through the pages and when he’s done he closes it up , lays his head on it and sighs contentedly, it’s beyond amazing to watch, and certainly makes the numerous hours of work well worth it! (I had no patterns or previous experience making one of these, so I figured it out as I went which we all know means it takes twice as long lol)

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G’s first dress and bonnet

G's first dress and bonnet

Right before G came home from the NICU I found a pattern online to make her a dress and bonnet. I altered it to fit her petit size, and the best part (to me) was that instead of buying fabric to make it, I used one of my maternity dresses 😀
It was suprisingly simple to make, espically with the sleeves being two long ties instead of a traditional sleeve. She out grew it rather quickly, but I’ve got it tucked away in her keepsake box for her 🙂

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Would the real slim Starburst please sit up

As some of you might know from “Kick up your heels” I’ve been going to Pilates lately to try and rebuild the muscles they had to cut for my emergency C-section with G. Well one of the moves is to lay on your back with your knees bent, feet flat on the floor and using only your “core” or abdominal muscles pull yourself into a sitting position.

Now enter me, with my oh so soft cuddly belly and miniscule abdominal muscles and you get entertainment; because I cannot do it. At all, not even half-way, trust me I tried, and tried and it ain’t happening. I huffed and puffed and squeezed my itty bitty muscles as hard as I could and I got the grand result of getting my shoulders off the mat. Not quite the accomplishment I’d been hoping for. Of course I had the fantastic Tatiana for a teacher tonight (I mean that sincerely, she really is a great teacher) and so she sees that I’m struggling (as always with that one) and comes over. Quietly she whispers encouragment to me that I will get there, but that I have to respect my body and what it’s telling me it can do just yet. My logical brain agrees with her completely, I’m an intelligent person, I’ve studied anatomy, I have a decent understanding of human physiology.

But my heart, oh my illogical, irrational heart it just wants to scream at my inability to just sit up. I mean think about it, I just want to be able to sit up, really is that such a big thing I wish for my body to do? NOPE. But without a great deal more work on my part it’s not going to happen. So after one petulant “But I want to be at that level now” I kicked the pity party outta my head and asked for “homework”. Moves I could do at home in addition to attending her classes to help get me closer to my goal of being strong and fit. Fear not faithful readers, if I can’t manage to sit up on my own I’ll just use the couch to pull myself up again so I can continue to write. 😉

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G’s Snail

G's Snail

I made this for my daughter, and while you can’t see clearly from the picture, the card attached says:

Should you ever feel sad or blue,
about what you can or cannot yet do…
Look at me and know that your pace is the perfect pace for you to go.

She’s a preemie, and sometimes she’s a bit slower to hit the milestones than a full-term baby would be. But I don’t ever want her to feel like she’s going at the wrong pace because of how fast some sheet of paper says she should be developing, instead I truly want her to know she’s doing exactly as she should at the exact right timing for her. 😀

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